• Katchina,
• i wake up in the morning,
• i walk over to the bathroom,
• pull down my pants,
• take out my wiener,
• and i piss excellence.

True Story

Life is a fucking cock block.

I looked today and the spider was gone.

AW MAN

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My Dream

My family was running away from this sickness that was spreading and we didn’t have a place to go so we slept in the car. But soon or later we found a place, it was in a summer church program where they let people stay. My dad and I got a different room than my mom and sister. The next day my sister and mom were gone and we couldn’t find them. Not to mention, the car was still here. My dad suggested that I kept a weapon close by and that we should go look for them. My dad told me he would go out first and look. He picked up a wooden bat and left. He never came back. Upon the hours of waiting my friend Josh walked in. I told him the situation and he wanted to help me find my mom and sister. He talked about how his whole family got separated. I gave Josh my aluminum bat and he tossed me his straight edge. I also put a few other blades in my pocket and we went out to look. Everything was still, no one was outside. It seemed like everyone vanished or something. Josh and I walked into the church that was a few buildings down. Everyone was in church but there was no singing, no praying or anything. Everyone was just staring in front of them. They looked like zombies or something. It scared the shit out of me. When we left the church we started running towards the car. I pulled the car keys out and unlocked the car and got in. When the car started I looked up and there was a man standing right in front of the car. It was my dad. I yelled out the window for him to get in but he didn’t move. I put my foot on the gas pedal but waited. Then all of a sudden he looked right into my eyes and jumped on the hood of the car. After that I put the pedal to the ground and he went tumbling off the car. I drove away and didn’t stop.

The church that we stayed at had like a whole campus and it seemed like I couldn’t find a way out.

As I was trying to find a way out of there I noticed a car behind me and it was following us. Josh was like “What the fuck is going on?” and I didn’t even reply to him, I had no fucking clue. As I turned a sharp turn there was an alley way that looked well hidden. I pulled the car in there really quickly. I looked behind us and the car that was following us passed by. The alley way I was in was connected to a basketball court, and there were a lot of people playing. I drove up on the court and everyone turned around. They were giving me the same look that my dad did. I locked the doors and rolled up the windows. As soon as I rolled up the window someone ran up to the car and started attacking the car, trying to smash the windows open. There was no one on Josh’s side of the car so he got out and started fucking people up with the bat. When the majority moved away from my side I got out and stabbed four of them with the straight edge. There had to be like 40 people. At least 25 of them charged at me. I jumped on the top of the car. When I did I could see Josh like 10 feet away still swinging at people. The people tried to get on top of the car to get me and all I had to do was stab them. After they were all dead I jumped down from being on top of the car and I noticed a pain in my thigh. I was bleeding from that area. I looked and the knife I had in my pocket accidentally stabbed me. I went to help Josh but he was gone. The people he was fighting were all dead. After a moment or two of trying to bandage my thigh I heard a drop of the bat Josh had. I looked behind me and he was standing fifty feet away from me. He was bleeding from the mouth. He booked it towards me and I stabbed him in the stomach. When he fell to the ground I took the bat and smashed him in the head. He wasn’t dead so I did it again and again. After about 5 times his head got red from internally bleeding. I gave it one last wack and his head split open.

I walked away from his body and I felt a sudden cold chill. My head starting to ache like you wouldn’t believe. Then I passed out.

I woke up in the attic of a church. I could see bells that they would ring when church was over. I looked around the room I was in and there was a giant wardrobe. I opened it and it was empty, except for a wooden bat inside. It was the same bat my dad had. I took it and walked down the stairs, I could hear someone walking towards me so I hid behind the door. It was a lady that walked in and she had a syringe in her hand filled with some kind of “medicine”. I walked away from behind the door and hit her right in the back of the head and she fell to the floor. I dragged her body, put her in the wardrobe and closed it. I walked down the stairs again and I heard people talking in the hallway semi close by. I snuck into the room across the hall. The room was empty but it had a large window that led to the floor below. So I jumped down. I knew I had to escape. I peeked into the circular hallways that was well lit and I didn’t see anyone. All of a sudden I heard a voice on the intercom. It said “Attention everyone, we have a test subject on the loose.” Then the alarm turned on. I didn’t take the chance on getting caught in the hallway and the room I had landed into had a doorway into another room so I went in there. The room I was in was pitch black. I looked in the hallway and I saw my dog Bronson. I walked near him but he walked away. Then I heard someone yell “STOP” behind me and it was a man carrying a syringe similar to the woman. I desperately ran away from him. I ran into a room that had another window that led to the floor below and jumped down. I ran into the hallway and there was a door that said Exit on it. I ran towards it but it was locked. Five people surrounded me all with syringes. There was no where to go.

Then I woke up. I was sweaty when I woke up too. That only happens when I have bad nightmares

Times 2

I’m trying to pronounce really fucking complicated medical terms.

-Bethamethasone

-Dipropionate

-Electrophotomicrographically

-Antidisestablishmentarianism

-Methamphetamine

-Dipropyltryptamine

Fucking intriguing.